A desperate plea

The words thrown
Land like knives
Cutting deep into his being
He restrains a cry
Fearful of sadistic mocking
Fighting tears

But no walls could hold back
The tidal wave of hurt
The creak of cement
As fissures form
Masks the cries of agony

Frustration
The why’s unanswered
As more blades attack
Giving in
He screams
A desperate plea to stop the pain
To cease the attacks
But no help comes

Alone with his tormentor
He stands tall
One last knife to finish
He looks into the eyes
The dark orbs of hate aimed at him
Draws the sharp metal across his pale wrists
Asking once more
Why

But no words return
Just a smile
He falls to the floor
So too does his reflection

Sizing Up to Feel Better – A Shopping and Clothes Post!

Well hello there readers…..Been a while since I actually wrote a proper ass post apart from links and poems, so I thought maybe I should write something.  Wasnt sure what, maybe an update on my depression, battle with self harm yada yada…but maybe next time.  Thought I could do something a little different that maybe wouldn’t be expected from my blog…..a fashion piece!!!

Yes I am blogging about…………….

I have been having ups and downs with my weight, I think it was made to look worse as I was hanging on to my old clothes and obviously they don’t fit anymore and that made me feel depressed.  But we are talking back when I was like a 32inch waist I aint that anymore…probably wont be again as I have not just put on weight but filled out too, which I am accepting, but at one point I managed to get down to a 28inch waist and I guess I still have parts of me that, although I wasnt “well” then, still misses that. Continue reading

Mumford and Wristcutters

So, I thought I would have a crack at making a video for youtube….i have never tubed(?) Youbede(?) meh i dunno..

Anyway, i wasnt sure what to do, but i saw a couple of videos where people have put music over clips of their favourite films so i thought i’d try that.  As Cat in The Hat wouldnt be very adequate i chose my other favourite movie “Wristcutters: A Love Story” (Click here for a previous post i made on this movie) and then decided on a song.  The song was the hardest bit to choose.  I have a massive range of musical tastes, i wondered if heavy, rock, acoustic, emo……i decided something soft but with a “journey” in the song…something that feels like it has a beginning, middle and end.  So i chose a Mumford and Sons song called “White Blank Page”.  It has a circular feel to it and a rise in the middle.

I’m babbling now, but anyway, here it is!!  First ever youtube video!!